{RBB} I had a breakdown

I lost it last week.

I was at my job and things were headed downhill fast.

I am very self-driven and somewhat of a control freak; throw in a bit of perfectionism which is of course driven by the ‘never good enough’ mantra that tends to run through my head.
And you have the perfect setting for a breakdown.

“The breakdown happens just before the breakthrough.”

breakthrough

 

My coping mechanism to deal with stress is to escape.
I have become a master of meditation in any situation and daydreaming, while still looking present, is a skill I have perfected.

I usually just get through the struggle and reflect on the meaning later, however this month I have committed to staying present ~ so I forced myself.

 

I stayed engaged and when I started to drift off, I would bring myself back.

 

It was hard. It was heavy. It sucked.

 

 

And then….

About halfway through this thoroughly crappy week I had my aha moment.

This moment usually doesn’t occur until I have survived whatever came my way and am reflecting on the meaning, lesson and how I could handle it differently (better) next time.

I was sitting there, talking with a colleague about how this shit needs to stop and it hit me, it was almost like I was seeing the situation from outside myself.

I immediately knew I created this situation.

I created it to force me to step into my role as a leader and take the reins in a way I never have before.

I saw the last year of my life in bursts of moments that I had been given the chance and I backed away.
I chose to stay small.

It is my time to play big and since I wouldn’t bite with the small bait, I (and the Universe) created a situation that I would be forced to handle and change my approach to my work, to my business, to my marriage, to my life.

And in that moment, when I got it was all an illusion and it was like a play and I had the starring role, I laughed.

My colleague looked at me like I was crazy, but I couldn’t stop….I couldn’t explain it either!

So we went back to our meetings and while the rest of the week was long hours and intense conversation, I continually found myself holding back a smile.

I had a secret.

My secret of seeing the purpose of the moment, while still in the moment.

Here’s to your secret,

Jenean

 

Wanna know more about what this challenge is and why I am babbling on about it?

Go here: my-weight-my-worth-my-money

 

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3-10-13 009Women have lost the ability to trust in their own heart, listen to their bodies and believe in themselves and that is fueling our life of fear and scarcity. 

It is part of my life’s purpose to help every woman reconnect with themselves and live a confident , prosperous life where you have the money, time and freedom to explore and create the life of your dreams.

It all starts with believing in you.”                        Jenean Zunk

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Michelle Greenman is The Women’s Wellness Coach.MG1

I am a coach who works with professional women who want a healthier lifestyle, one that fits their busy schedule and gets results like maintaining a healthy weight, creating natural energy and disease proofing their bodies. My 7 steps natural health program teaches them how to take control their health, to know, love and transform their body.

Connect with me at http://www.michellegreenman.com

 

* Thanks to Brian Fuller for the photo!

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